So it is time to be back here. The clock has taken many furious rounds in the meanwhile, more than 200. Uncertainities are back again - and I am back with the ever dwindling confidence in myself and the world around. How many times I have felt the control slipping away. People before me must have felt the same. Do I see the smiling face of my late father?

Ringtones, Music, Cacophany all put together the world around me has become a system of oppression. The nerves, the mind and the auditory organs all tend to revolt, but I am yet to be deaf because I am yet not dumbed by the crazy world. I still feel I would be able to find some meaning from this most haphazard existence - human existence. Trying to find patterns. Trying build sense into what defies sense.

While the singular certainty of life is forgotten I keep looking for certainty in the uncertainities.

I must be a sensible fellow to do that. Others do not try the same. They just swing with the times. They are in the stream. I am out of it and would choose to be against the stream if I were compelled to choose.